Friday, November 30, 2007

Ek Calgary mein ek partha raghu thatha

If you are not familiar with tamil movies, the above title will not make sense. If you did'nt get the above title, get someone familiar with tamil movies to explain the context of this scene - 'ek gaon mein' (Oh yeah.. ridiculously horrible acting.. but once you know the context and the fact that very few tams know Hindi, it is really funny). My hindi learning experience in Calgary has been similar :).

1.) Was speaking to a friend about Sanskrit and suddenly realized that another good friend's father is a Sanskrit professor and I turned to him and said...

'Tera baap sanskrit ka prof hai na?'

The reply came with a rather unusual stern face, 'Saala.. kya bol rahe ho?' :D

Took some explanation to make him understand that it was an error... hehe..


2.) Was teaching another friend tamil and was explaining relationships in tamil. That day I was teaching relationships and was explaining the tamil word 'periyamma', which refers to ones mom's elder sister. I did'nt know the hindi word for that relationship and hence explained it. Unfortunately, after I started explaining, I forgot the word for elder in hindi for a crucial few seconds and I ended up saying..

'Teri maa kee................' (long pause) :D and then I said.. 'badi bahen ko kaise bulavoge'?

Her face turned red and she said.. 'kameena.. gaali kyoon de rahe ho... maine kya kiya?'

Thankfully, she knew my Hindi skills and we both had a good laugh when we realized it :)


3.) Went to a friends house for some puja during Diwali and found a photo of some old guru. Wanted to feign interest on the guru and wanted to ask his name and so I asked..

'Uska naam kya hai'
:D

'Unnnnkaaaaaa'... was the stern reply..... :)


... and so continues my hindi escapades!!!!

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Material and its beauty.

Material world, made of matter is so beautiful ..
Material world, a reflection of the immense spiritual world ..
Material world is for our understanding to get into the spiritual world ..
Life is so beautiful when we understand this and use materiality to cross the ocean of life.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Wisdom

I had been to the edge of my life,
I saw wisdom ..

Where were you when I lived,
Why do show up when I die ..?

I was searching for you outside,
keeping you inside,
lived and died an unreal life ..

To live what I saw,
In this life,
I turn my ..

wishes as real,
ego as nothing,
material as divine, and
divine as life ..

As I find myself,
I find you .. and will find ..

the death is no end,
the birth is no beginning,
the life is a continued story,
the present is only real ...

the wisdom I saw long long ago !
ஞானம்

வாழ்வின் எல்லைக்கு சென்றீருந்தேன்,
கண்டேன் ஞானத்தை ...

முடிவில் தோன்றிய ஞானம்,
வாழ்வில் தோன்றவில்லையே ? ...

எது மறைத்தது என்னை,
தேடீனேனே உன்னை,
கண்டது வெறும் மண்ணை ...

முன் இறப்பில் தோன்றிய ஞானம்,
இப்பிப்பில் அறிய ...

ஆசையை கலைத்து,
அகத்தினை ரித்து,
பொருளை இறையாக்கி,
இறையை வாழ்வாக்கி,
வாழ்கிறேன் என்னை.

வாழ்ந்து ..

நான் .. நானா௧ ...
நானா௧ .. நீயாக ...

அன்றும், இன்றும், என்றும் ஒன்றென ...
பிறப்பும், இறப்பும் பொய்யென ...
நேரமூம், காலமும் இன்றென ...
பெற்றென் இஞ்ஞானத்தை.

Delhi, Gujarat, Nandigram

1984 - Delhi anti-sikh riots


2002 - Gujarat riots


2007 - Nandigram pogrom



Congress was in power for the first one, BJP in power during the second and the CPI(M) in power for the third one. Can you find any difference between the three?

Monday, November 19, 2007

God and Satan

Neither is needed for good and bad events. The best of actions that the human mind can ever conceive can be and regularly gets done by humans and the worst evil act that the human mind can ever synthesize regularly gets committed by humans.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

கேட்டேன்

அச்சம் அறியா இதயம் கேட்டேன்
ஆசை அருக்கும் வல்லமை கேட்டேன்
இயற்கை நானே என்ற உணர்வு கேட்டேன்
ஈசனை எங்கும் காட்டும் பார்வை கேட்டேன்
உண்மை உறைக்கும் ஆற்றல் கேட்டேன்
ஊழ் வெல்லும் திண்மை கேட்டேன்
எண்ணம் விண்நோக்கி செல்ல கேட்டேன்
ஏக்கம் இல்லா நாள் கேட்டேன்
ஜந்தும் என் சொல் பணிய கேட்டேன்
ஒற்றுமை எங்கும் நிலைக்க கேட்டேன்
ஓயாமல் உழைத்திடும் உடல் கேட்டேன்
ஔழதம் கேட்கா யாக்கை கேட்டேன்

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

One night of solitude

It was 2 am in the morning and Sheeba wakes up with huge bang in her head. Her whole body was shaking and there was intense pain in the back of her head as if a thousand needles were injected together! Heart thumping faster than ever... she could hear her heartbeat. With shaky hands, she touches her temple to feel the nerves.. lo! they were bulging out and were beating equally fast! Looked like her heart and head were competing with each other.

"Hmm... Am I dying? Or am I having a nervous breakdown or was it a bad dream that left me in this state?".. She asked herself. Without even a clue of what was happening to her, she sat down and tried calming herslef. Picked up the bottle of water by her bedside and drank it all in one go! It tasted different! Sheeba felt her forehead again.. no.. it was as cold as ice! No trace of fever. Her hands and feet were freezng too! She was thinking to herself.. this could be an effect of a very bad dream or an indication of falling sick. To avoid panicking, she sat down on her bed, heart and head still beating fast.. closed her eyes and tried calming herself. Immediately a series of pictures started flashing in front of her eyes. She felt as if she was watching a slide presentation of her life! Pictures after pictures... more pictures kept rolling..

Her life as a kid, school, parents, family, friends, home town, different experiences, work place, beautiful mountains, places she had visited.. everything kept rolling one after the other. Pictures of her brother, the games they played, the fights they had, the arguments they had, the warm hugs.. she opened her eyes. "No, this is no good. I should not get lost in my past right now. I need to get some sleep.. have a long day to go tomorrow".. she tells to herself and decides not to drown in flow of picturesque memories instead grab some sleep before she geared up for a long day ahead.

She sinks back into her bed, hides herself under the warmth of her comforter. 5, 10, 15... 30 min pass and she would not get any sleep. She was completely awake and her brain was active. Suddenly she remembers her mother saying "start counting when you cannot get sleep. That would put you to sleep immediately". So, she starts counting.. 1, 2, 3... goes on and on and after sometime she realizes that she had counted over a thousand and still no sleep! Hmm.. she chuckles and feels happy that she had disproved her mother! Immediately she picks up the phone and calls her mother. When the number was being connected, she has several thoughts running in her mind. "What if mom is asleep? or what if she is busy with some work or what if she is not at home, what if she gets scared that I have called her up at this unusual hour?" .. Her fingers press the off button involuntarily. " No.. I need to talk to her. I cannot stop this urge". Sheeba dials the number again...and disconnects it once again when she has those thoughts. "Oh.. what is wrong with my fingers? Why can't they stop this nonsense?" She grins and after sometime repeats it again. After several such attempts, she finally decides not to do that anymore and divert her attention at something else.

Well, how about talking to a close friend? She picks up the phone again and dials his number. "Well, would he be annoyed? Or maybe he would get worried. Possibly he may even come to see me if Im ok. Oh.. it is not reasonable to wake him up at this hour and trouble him. I will not do this." She tells herself and disconnects. But within seconds, she was redialling his number. Again... has series of thoughts and feels like it would be weird to call him up at that hour and disconnects. Her fingers would not listen to her anymore. Involuntarily they would press the redial button and she would then disconnect it within a few seconds. This goes on and on..

"Hmm.. what am I doing? Let me do something else instead of crazily pressing buttons over the phone", she said to herself. Her head was still heavy. To get rid of the pain, she swallows a pill. Since it would take sometime for the pill to be effective, she picks up a book "Blindness" and starts reading. As she goes through the first few pages, she realizes that it is a depressing book talking about a city where everyone are blind. There was no point in reading it anymore. Thinking this, she puts the book back in its place and looks around in her room.. hopeful of finding something interesting to do. Suddenly she gets a thought.. "why not clean the room?" Sheeba had always been a well organized person. Her room was clean as usual. But to keep herself engaged, she decides to clean her room and starts organizing stuff on her table, her bookshelf, clothes.. within an hour she had cleaned up the whole place again! She had a smile on her face. At the same time she had a feeling.. a feeling of loneliness.. she felt like crying. Falling back into her bed, she covers her face with her hands and starts weeping. Tears just keep rolling.. nonstop!

It had been quite sometime since she was staying alone, away from her home, away from her parents.. and she had been through so much of pain, fear and loneliness that she had no clue of what kind of mixed feelings she had in her mind. It was as if the tears were not just tears, but bundles of emotions wrapped up into small crystals of water! She wept and wept for quite long until her eyes would not produce anymore tears. Then she felt much better. Her heart was now less heavier. It was about 6am by then.

Sheeba walked over to the window, and looked out. It had snowed outside, very mild, and it looked as if someone had painted it all white with a paintbrush. A squirrel was actively looking for food. She watched the squirrel for sometime and felt happy that it was lonely too.. but very active. Sheeba's life had been so full of experiences. Every experience had taught her something new. Some experiences had filled in more energy and enthusiasm in her and some had left her devastated. But she had made sure to fight back and keep moving ahead. Watching the very active squirrel, she suddenly felt like she had new enthusiasm filled in her again. A night of extreme solitude had helped her relieve pain and filled her with new energy.

With a huge smile on her face she goes into the kitchen to make herself some coffee...

Farm suicides

1.5 lakh farm suicides from 1997 to 2005
Farm suicides rising, most intense in 4 States

Read these two articles on 'The Hindu'. The five States Maharashtra, Andhra Pradesh, Karnataka, Madhya Pradesh (including Chattisgarh) and Kerala are the ones that have the stigma of having the most farm suicides. This is depressing news indeed. Of course, no one cares. If Sensex falls by 1000 points, the whole country will be worried about the bloodbath on dalal street. What makes this news more poignant is that except AP, none of these states are water starved. Makes one wonder... hmmm...

Friday, November 09, 2007

Fear

"Am I afraid?" I pose this question to myself every time I am in an introspective mood. Invariably the answer is yes. The follow up question would be 'What is it that I am afraid of?' Invariably, I am unable to nail it. I am not able to make a roster of things that scare me to death. Is it that the list (if it exists) is too complex for me to put down or is it that I am confused? Or is it just that I am afraid to face reality? Is it the same with everyone else too?

Our lives these days are full of "Fear". At every stage of our lives we fear. From the little kid to the dying old man.... all have fear.

Fear of failing, fear of falling, fear of not getting admission into school, fear of not getting a job, fear of loving, fear of being loved, fear of loneliness, fear of being in a crowd, fear of not getting married, fear of not having an affair, fear of having a relationship, fear of not having a relationship, fear of not finding the right partner, fear of infections, fear of diseases, fear of being adventurous, fear of not having a good luxurious life, fear of speaking, fear of not being liked, fear of being judged.... and the list goes on! Just endless!

Lets forget the fears of physical harm and look more at the emotional fears. These emotional fears take a huge toll on our lives. We are no more what we are. We hide ourselves in a cocoon of fears and portray a completely different "self" fitting into all the norms and patterns that which the society calls "Normal". As time progresses, we get sufficiently inured to these fears that we start fearing losing these fears coz we become the sum total of all our fears. We become non-entities without our fears.

The classic example of fear taking a toll would be the unfortunate truth that our 'likes' and 'dislikes' are dictated by our fears. Fear of being judged a non-conformist, fear of being rejected, fear of being a failure, fear of not being accepted and many other variants of these fears decides what we like and what we don't like. Thus, we set agendas to our emotions. Starting from the simplest thing to the most significant things, our fears rule the roost.

This split within ourselves, between what we actually are and what our fear makes us be, has horrifying consequences. It reduces a human, full of emotions and possibilities, into a machine at best and a corpse at worst. Externally, the person has a shape and form, but internally, unbeknownst to the rest of the world, the person has a totally differnt shape and form. A large chunk of the persons life is wasted in arbitrating the fight between these two parts. Just contemplate for a minute about the scenario when this fight stops. In my humble opinion, its so splendorous and wonderful. The possibilities are huge and the person will live his/her life to the fullest.

The fact is, we all suffer from "Multiple Personality Disorder(MPD)". We mask ourselves into different personalities and portray them as and when it fits. Why is it then only a few people are treated for MPD??... when the whole society is sufferring from this disorder? Can something be done about this?

Unless our fears do not harm anyone else and also we do not land up being "paranoids of fear", affecting ourselves completely, it is reasonable to have some amount of fear. The best we can do is, stop doubting everything and anything and stop having agendas for our emotions! Just be ourselves and give room for some lunacy every now and then and let our emotions flow.

After a month long of continuous fear, introspection, retrospection, discussion with friends... I have been able to answer my question partially...

Atleast now, I can face the reality and proudly say that "Yes, I am afraid" and treat myself with some lunacy that we all crave for, but never really have the courage to do it in real because we are all bugged by the huge bug of "Fear"!
Diwali Special!

The Diga was gloomy one afternoon... reason being... she had seen some videos of child labourers in Sivakasi that morning. A good enough reason for anyone on earth to feel sad about...


To calm down her feelings, she calls her not so amiable friend.. the Tam for a walk. They walk for a while silently. The Tam is confused about this behavior of the often overzealous diga. Not able to tolerate the silence anymore, he goes...

Tam: Hey diga! What's up? Why are you so gloomy and silent today? Is everything ok with you? Is anything wrong with your work or any problem at home? Speak up!

Diga: Saako... sumniro!(enough.. keep quite). Im in no mood to talk today.

Tam: Why? What happened? Never saw you so reticent.. Please tell me..

Diga: You tams! You are murderers!

(The tam is taken aback suddenly...)

Tam: What are you blabberring? Why are you calling us murderers? Are you nuts?

Diga: Nuts? You call me nuts? You... you tams... you kill children! Have you seen the Sivakasi video?

Tam being a proud tam... never could he take such a blame. He goes...

Tam: Diga.. think and speak! Do not say like that. We do not kill children. By the way, which video are you talking about? What Sivakasi? What murder?
I do not know anything about it!

All I know is, Sivakasi is the largest suppliers of crackers in India. And that is a reason to be proud of!

When I was working in Bangalore... on the day of diwali, I could not find a shop selling crackers! Later on I got to know that crackers are sold out of the city in some stupid playground! Ridiculous! During diwali you do not have crackers. And to get one.. you have to travel out of the city! What a diga nation! No crackers! Im proud that in my tam nation we make crackers and burn as many as we want!

This was enough for the diga to become outrageous. Without a second thought she jumps at the tam.. and punches him on his face and shouts...

Diga: You tam! You idiot tam! You have child labourers in your nation! And you support it! Ridiculous! I hate you!

Tam: Hey hey.. stop this! Child labour is in every state in India. Show me one state which does not have child labourers. People in glass buildings should not be throwing stones on others.

Diga: Shut up!

Tam: Have you visited the hotels and messes in Bangalore?? Everywhere kids are seen working.

At this the diga shouts at the top of her voice..

Diga: Atleast we do not burn kids alive!

Tam: Hmmm...atleast we kill only ourselves.. not others..

Diga: Shut up you idiot! You kill kids.. what could be more gruelling crime than this?

Tam: You buy the products... stop importing crackers from tam land

Diga: You have policy notes for child labour..but nothing is done. We too have.. but atleast we have policies for every taluk and such a brutal crime is not prevalent in diga nation.

Tam: Stop buying crackers from Sivakasi then. You buy all the crackers and instigate the villains to employ the kids

Diga: Ha! You may say that you are the one who are supplying 90% of the fireworks demand in the country. Thats appreciable. But it shouldn't be achieved at the cost of children's health, education and prosperity. And you.. being an intellectual.. you support it... even if it is for the sake of argument

Tam: Hmmm.. thats not true. Lots of things are bad. Today is the first time you have brought up this issue. I say surrender.. Satisfied?

Diga: Well... surrender... but im not satisfied... Im brutally unforgiving.

Tam: Hmmmm...that is indeed a big problem :( cracker factories no doubt.

Diga: I will never burst crackers ever again. I promise myself.

Tam: Great!!!

Diga: What about you?

Tam: Definitely not.

Diga: What not? You will not burst or not promise?

Tam: aaha... lawyer diga! Diga MA BL
I will not burst crackers
pothumaaaaaaaaa????

Diga: Never in your life...

Tam: Yup yup. For sure
No way will I burst crackers

Diga: Neither will you ever allow anyone in your family or friends to do so. I mean.. atleast you will try to stop them.

Tam: yes yes

Diga: Good!

Tam: Finally I can see some smile on my diga's face! Thank god!

The diga gives a broad smile... and then they continue walking silently again... and the diga starts...

Diga: Hey you stupid tam.. have you seen those videos??

And the fight continues....

PS: Check out these links about the Sivakasi child labourers.

1. http://www.nerve.in/news:25350098091
2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zt6YLUnWCsc
3. http://www.indianexpress.com/story/236541.html

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Sex education

A person whom I have met a few times in Chennai said the following in a discussion on this topic in a mailing list I subscribe too. I loved this.

... more than sex education, gender education would be great where stereotypes about each gender are broken down, so that boys don't end up being sexually frustrated, misogynistic men and girls don't end up being subservient men haters...

All I want to say is... Amen!!!

Saturday, November 03, 2007

World Bank to give $944 mn loan to India

This news item appeared in rediff today.

Laozi, philosopher in ancient China, said in his book 'Tao te Ching' that 'thorn bushes spring up wherever the army has passed'. I think that statement could be adopted to our times too. We could say that pollution, exploitation and resource depletion will spread on an epidemic scale in all places the World bank and the IMF have cast their eyes on.

The world bank is NOT our nice neighbourhood well to do man whom we can rely on to take care of our sudden financial needs. It is controlled primarily by the american government which in turn is controlled by transnational corporations. So, no such benevolent act of world bank comes without threads attached. You can find tonnes of resources on the Internet and possibly in your local bookstore on the workings of the World bank. One starting point could be this site - '50 years is enough'.

The news item referred to earlier does not mention what concessions India had to make to the all powerful TNC's to get this loan. It would be interesting to know them. Also, it explicitly states that 64 of the 944 million dollars is going to Karnataka. Caveat diga nation!!!

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Sports

The Tam was having a tough time that day. He had a longer than the usual 3 hour meeting with his supervisors. That meeting went on for 6 hours. No. They were not trying to figure out the meaning of life. They were just trying to get that elusive proof needed for the Tam to complete his thesis. Also, he had a reasonably big fight with one of his supervisors on some lemma. The Tam really wanted to say 'Thesis sign pannatiyum kutram kutrame!!!' (A parody on a old tamil saying. A poet has a fight with Lord Shiva and says to the lord that even if you open your third eye, a mistake is a mistake. This one by the Tam means, even if you don't sign my thesis, a mistake is a mistake). But, alas, he never got to say that as the person whom he was having the fight was not Indian. Nevertheless, after such a tiring meeting, he went to the digas house for dinner.

No matter what the other persons mental state is, these two can never talk for more than 30 mts without a fight.

Diga: Did you see the cricket match yesterday? We got so badly thrashed by the Aussies.

Tam: Yeah yeah. I did see it. All because of that dumb diga Dravid. He played too slowly.

Diga: Hello. Don't say anything about Dravid. He is the wall and without him Indian cricket is nothing. Also he is not a born diga.

Tam: Yeah yeah.

Diga: What yeah yeah. Digas have contributed to Indian cricket phenomenally. So many cricket stars in the recent past are from the diga nation. Dravid, Kumble, Prasad etc... Even Uthappa, the biggest upcoming star, is a diga. Mind it.

And she goes again. Listing the greatness of the diga nation. The tam still not yet completely out of the 6 hr meeting, is not fighting at full strength.

Tam: Yeah yeah.

Diga: What da? No enthu to fight or have I cornered you today. I think its the second case. Who was the last significant Tam cricketer? Kris Srikanth? That was 20 years ago. You guys dont even contribute to the countries most popular sport.

This finally got his adrenalin flowing.

Tam: We dont contribute to dumb games like cricket. We are smart and intelligent people. We contribute to the game of brains, the game that was oringally invented in India, the game people with the highest IQ's play.. chess. Look at Viswanathan Anand. He is the world champion in chess. How many grandmasters has the diga nation produced?

Diga: Dont rest on the laurels of one Tam da. That too a guy who does even stay in India. He stays most of the time in Spain. Do you know that?

Tam: Yeah yeah. Wherever he stays, he is still a Tam.

Diga: You will never accept defeat. Stupid fellow. Try to contribute to Indias most popular game. Even you watch every match. Remember that.

Tam: Yeah yeah.

And she realized that he was in no mood to fight today. So, she decided it was time to have dinner. They went had the roti cooked by the diga after that.


Statutory warning: This is purely only for fun. The tam and diga participating in the series, love the other persons language and culture just as theirs. No harm intended to anyone in any way whatsoever.